Nuclear weapons. Meh.

In the past few days the world has been alerted to the fact that North Korea, in all likelihood, has "the bomb". I have two words for this development: so what? North Korea is a country in shambles. It doesn't have resources. It doesn't have friends. All it has is the possibility that it might posess "the bomb", which last time I checked doesn't do much for problems A and B. North Korea is the goth in the high-school of the world, hiding in some dark corner of the hallway wearing a "Nightmare Before Christmas" t-shirt (purchased at hot topic with his mom's credit card), listening to music no one likes, skipping both breakfast AND lunch, posting pseudo-artistic pictures of himself on his myspace, and taking stupid, unpopular positions on political issues just to worry people. North Korea and it's dear leader Kim "possible" Jong Il just want to be noticed, they want to stand out from all the other worthless dictatorships, and like all goth's, they want to shock their parents (China, Russia, etc), by deliberately disobeying them, engaging in behaviors that go against their values, and in general, just seeing how far they can go without getting into major trouble. But anyways, leaving that terribly irrelevant analogy, North Korea really is all bark and no bite. Kim "Chi" Jong Il knows very well that his poverty-stricken country with it's stagnant socialist economy can't survive without foreign aid. He also knows that if it really came down to war, the United States, the EU, South Korea, Japan, Russia, and possibly China would collectively kick his megalomaniac butt. Dear Leader isn't like the president of Iran, whatever his name is, because he isn't a religious dictator. He doesn't have any intention of being a martyr, summoning the apocylypse, and he holds no belief that Allah will assure his victory. Kim "I've run out of nicknames" Jong Il will only fight in a war he thinks he can win. So, in other words, I don't think North Korea is really planning on using their new weapons any time soon. Lil' Kim just wants to be a big man on the international scene. But Kim, I have some news for you. You are a very small man with funny hair and big glasses. Embrace your identity. Become an accountant or a comedian. End this charade.